Sunday, September 30, 2007

Preity Princess

I liked Jaan-e-Mann, but some of Preity's clothes need our attention.

What era is this supposed to be evoking? It's a flashback to the character's college days, so if we assume they're 30ish, that would put us at the mid- to late-1990s. The gothic font trucker cap and princess lingo say 2002, but the torn jeans are more 1993 and the stacks of plastic bracelets remind me of 1984. And the hair beads? No clue.

Whatever the era, the look is clearly, you know, bad-ass. Maybe the whole thing is supposed to be mockable. It definitely is when Anupam wears it.

Also, the white shoes make me itch, even if she is just an extra with a scrunchie.

(all photos from Jaan-e-Mann, 2006)

Thursday, September 27, 2007

Bollywood Man-Nipple - Part 2: When Bad Nipples Happen to Good People

Shahrukh, we need to talk. Again.

Ignoring the India FM insignia across your chest, there are a few problems. I'm going to ask this straight-up. Please put a shirt on.

I'm not going to lie, SRK, we've had nipple issues with you before. There's your penchant for wearing transparent shirts, a proclivity that is widely documented in the films of Karan Johar.

But this.

This is a problem.

I do have to admit that I like the construction worker motif. There are certain professions that are more attractive than others. Some are drawn to pilots and military men, because who doesn't love a guy in uniform? Others like artists and actors, who are more creative. Quite frankly, a construction worker is sexy because you know that he's got to be good with his hands. And I like the hair, too. In fact, I like everything that's going on above the neck and below the waist.


Your man-nipples.

Shahrukh, let's not mince words. You're an attractive guy, but you're over forty. And I don't know what the heck you have done to yourself to make your arm-veins pop out like a blood donor's dream. To top it off, you are not oozing sex appeal, as may have been the goal in this photo shoot. You are just plain oozing. I do not know what you are oozing, but that is gross. And it is oozing all over your normally lovely man-nipples. (And we know they're lovely, because we've seen Dil Se).

I know you're catching a lot of flak for this (see Beth's earlier post), and I know it's all in the name of movie promotion, but Shahrukh, please - do us all a favor. Put those man-nipples away.

Wednesday, September 19, 2007

OMG. WTF, SRK? round 2

Leaving the abs aside for a minute - because they are frightening and wrong - take a closer look at his jeans. (You officially have permission to stare at his crotch.)

I've never seen jeans like that. They look a little uncomfortable. Anyone want to offer a guess as to what the extra patch is for?

King Khan is also the current King of Bollywood Fugly, topping our index with 11 entries. Woot!

Monday, September 17, 2007

Bobby... Again

From Nanhe Jaisalmer.

Pony-hawk? (click to enlarge)

Jeans with applique? (click to enlarge)

Thursday, September 06, 2007

literary fug

There's something about this shirt/tie combo that reminds me of 1980s American mall staple Chess King (maybe Shahrukh chose his ensemble from a store that had a word in its title in common with the book du jour).

Photos courtesy of IndiaGlitz.

Granted the bottom picture also has a very unfortunate facial expression, maybe caught mid-sentence and mid-head turn to look at a different photographer, but the shirt is really annoying for having such basic components. It's like a really bland but still bad twist on the Don: The Chase Begins Again shirt-and-tie-from-same-fabric look, but just the collar and tie this time.

So in conclusion: book good, shirt and tie bad.

Also: real book collection or fake-pretend library?